[In their own ways they are both too fragile for this. He doesn't know how to handle all of this any more than she does.
But she's absolutely right. The enormity of the world beyond merely what duty demands of him leaves him feeling unmoored in so many ways. Chiefly among them is the emotions he'd never permitted himself to feel, let alone acknowledge. The sudden breadth of opportunities he had no idea how to filter and dismiss. Things he should chose between but somehow now, having let so many years, decades of said opportunities slip past he simply... doesn't know how to let others go now.
He should. For Regis' sake. For Will's. For his own maybe even. But the knowledge of how to regulate, to find some middle ground between feeling everything and seizing every opportunity or standing back, untouched by everything around him, is so far out of his grasp.]
I cannot fault you for distrusting this. As much as I want to insist it couldn't only be the wine I have no way of guaranteeing that myself.
I do care for you, though. Wine or no, that is not a question.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2020-01-09 05:31 am (UTC)But she's absolutely right. The enormity of the world beyond merely what duty demands of him leaves him feeling unmoored in so many ways. Chiefly among them is the emotions he'd never permitted himself to feel, let alone acknowledge. The sudden breadth of opportunities he had no idea how to filter and dismiss. Things he should chose between but somehow now, having let so many years, decades of said opportunities slip past he simply... doesn't know how to let others go now.
He should. For Regis' sake. For Will's. For his own maybe even. But the knowledge of how to regulate, to find some middle ground between feeling everything and seizing every opportunity or standing back, untouched by everything around him, is so far out of his grasp.]
I cannot fault you for distrusting this. As much as I want to insist it couldn't only be the wine I have no way of guaranteeing that myself.
I do care for you, though. Wine or no, that is not a question.